A Man’s Biggest Issue In Life

A Man’s Biggest Issue In Life

By Jamie Matthewman
August 20th, 2016

What do you think the biggest men’s issues are? In fact forget that…what’s your biggest issue in life right now?

Impotence, losing your job, illness, lack of money, a challenging relationship, failing business, mounting debts etc etc?

I’m not in the slightest suggesting any of these are ideal, I’ve been through most, but I am suggesting the biggest men’s issues aren’t really any of these. I’m not trying to detract from the significance of stuff that’s occurring in your life that you may not want, but what I share here will help you to navigate life’s challenges with less struggle, at least that’s been true for me.

So I believe the biggest and perhaps only issue men are up against, is the gap between how they think life works and how it actually works.

So today I want to show you under the bonnet (hood) so to speak, so that you can get a glimpse of how the machinery operates, because once you understand the workings of the system, it no longer has power over you.

So let me tell you a story about struggling…I could write a book about struggling…life at times has FELT really fucking hard. I never questioned why for a long time, I assumed it was just the way it was, so innocently I became a victim of life. It appeared to me that life kept dealing me a really shit card time after time so I made it the enemy.

It came to a point where I’d decided enough is enough. I have felt really despondent at time and thought if this is how it’s going to be for the rest of my life, what’s the point? Obviously I didn’t throw in the towel, in fact it was a defining moment, because if I was going to spend a further possible 70 years on this planet, things needed to change.

I needed to change, which began my exploration into how the mind and life really work. What I discovered is that the mind only works one way…from inside out. This is interesting because it means that you and I are never a victim of life or our circumstances.

The misconception is that the outside world creates our feelings, so if for instance you’re having a bad day at work, then you’d blame being at work, your boss, your workload or customers for you bad feelings.

But that isn’t how it works.

I am not saying there won’t be bosses, customers or colleagues who can be awkward. However the truth is, if life’s feeling difficult or hard, in those moments you’re actually an innocent victim of your own thinking.

Who knew?!

That’s not to say there aren’t unquestionably difficult people and tough events in life to deal with…breakups (this article will help you avoid having one!), illnesses, the death of loved ones, losing jobs, failing businesses, tight cash flow’s etc etc

I’ve been through the lot, so I have no dispute things can be hard, but even if your circumstances are physically challenging, the struggle, stress, anxiety you’ve felt has NO direct correlation with the circumstances of your life.

I’m not saying there isn’t any correlation because events do influence our thinking but I guess even in the midst of challenges you’ve had times when you’ve felt determined as well as deflated or lacking motivation. Perhaps one day you think you’re relationship’s great and the next you want out.

What do you put these changes of feelings down to? In relationships most people blame their discontent on the moods, attitudes or behaviour of their partners. At work people blame their lack of motivation on their environment, their boss or something else external.

This is normal because from a very young age we’re conditioned to believe that our happiness and well being comes from career success, money, women, accomplishments etc

But if that were true, how come there are people, who perhaps you know, who’ve got everything materially but aren’t happy and there are others with very little or maybe have disabilities or illness, who are thriving?

I’ll tell you why, it’s because your state of mind, the psychological temporary state you bring to each moment, isn’t determined by anything outside of you such as your partner, your circumstances, your bank balance.

If you feel stressed, stuck, unhappy, anxious or any other feeling you don’t want – you’re an an innocent victim of your own thinking and feeling patterns. But the fact is most people believe outside conditions determine how they feel in life moment to moment. So it’s no wonder we spend our lives striving to create the perfect conditions for happiness such as relationship, high levels of wealth, status etc

All of which can potentially be useful and enjoyable, but what if you didn’t have to wait until all the ducks were in order to have life feel more fulfilling? This is where the power of thought comes in…

The Creative Power of Thought

Like the greatest magicians who set out to trick you into believing they’re illusions are real, thought is the great illusionist which tricks you time and time again into believing that your feelings are coming from something other than your own thinking in the moment.

When most people talk about thought, they’re referring to the personal stuff you think about such as your ideas, goals, problems, beliefs, preferences, judgements but these are descriptions of how we use the principle of thought.

The principle of thought is formless – it’s before the content of your personal thinking. It is the ultimate creative lifelong gift you and everyone else on this planet has, which forms our individual PERCEPTUAL realities.

All you ever experience is your own personal thinking appearing as a true representation of other people and situations dependent on your level of consciousness in the moment.

So for instance if you’ve been worrying about losing your job, you’ll be seeing life through worry tinted spectacles, this will make your experience of life feel difficult, but it’s nothing to do with the fact your job may be at risk.

But I know when you’re in it, it is so difficult to see, because our minds full of what I’m calling ‘contaminated thinking’, so we may not notice the blueness of the sky or the smiles on peoples faces, as someone who’s living in the moment without worrisome/contaminated thinking.

It is important to appreciate that everyone is experiencing their own separate reality, what may seem a big deal to one person, may not even cross another person’s mind. Each person on this planet is having a uniquely different experience of life which is being created by the principle of thought. I’m not suggesting things out there such as chairs, people, bosses etc don’t exist. I’m sure they do, but you experience the outside world subjectively via the power of thought.

The truth is YOU and I are living in a thought created world. You don’t experience reality, you experience the principle of thought taking form in the moment. If we believe our feelings are originating from something other than thought in the moment, we can get into trouble, our performance can suffer and we can make poor decisions because we innocently give up our power.

The deeper you get this, the more you’ll see the powerful implications this will have on your life.

This article is taken from my 90 Day Personal Transformation Program which offers you a pathway to greater freedom, clarity and purpose in your life you can sign up for free here.

Further Articles You’ll Enjoy

What Are Your Core Values and Are You Living Them?
How to Save A Relationship That’s On The Rocks
Feeling Stuck in a Rut?

Jamie Matthewman

About Jamie Matthewman

Jamie is the founder, main contributor and editor of The Inspired Man.

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