The ONE Thing Men Need to Know About How to be Successful in Life
The definition of success simply means the accomplishment of an aim or purpose, and as you’ve already accomplished many goals so far in your life, you know how to achieve success.
So why is it you’re still left questioning how to be successful in life?
The questioning isn’t a bad thing, it may lead you to the truth. However if you find yourself constantly striving for ‘more’, because nothing ever feels like it’s enough. I’d argue it’s because your goals don’t really matter.
You’re probably thinking of course they matter, it’s common sense. But do they really?
I observe lots of men who spend years working incessantly hard towards goals they think are important e.g. faster cars, high net worths, fame and status etc never realising the reason they do what they do is rooted in trying to prove to themselves and society, that they’ve made it as a man, that they’re good enough.
The trouble is they innocently live stressful, inauthentic lives and often burn themselves out in the process of pampering their egos need for attention, only to be left feeling empty, like something’s missing.
The problem with cosmetic goals – goals focused on covering up perceived cracks, is they’re based on the idea you don’t have what you think you need to be happy, but for most men reading this, that’s probably not the problem.
The problem is you’re not seeing what you already have.
The fact is, you probably don’t need anything more, at least materially. Adding more to your life isn’t really going to make much difference.
You might be able to pimp things up a bit, but your quality of life and life expectancy far exceeds any man who’d achieved the highest echelons of success in life 200 or 100 years ago. Perhaps even 50 years ago.
They couldn’t get healthy and nutritious food 24/7, state of the art medical care, connect with almost anyone in the world, access an infinite amount of life changing information from the palm of their hand, travel anywhere in the world for less than £1000 or enjoy the large choice of leisure opportunities available in your local town such as gyms, restaurants, cinemas, bars etc etc.
A hundred years ago, even the world’s elite couldn’t get close to this and neither can billions of people on this planet today.
According to the UN, nearly 1/2 of the world’s population — more than 3 billion people — live on less than $2.50 a day and more than 1.3 billion live in extreme poverty — less than $1.25 a day and some 1.1 billion people in developing countries have inadequate access to water, and 2.6 billion lack basic sanitation.
So we are lucky our definition of success goes beyond day to day survival.
However on the downside, a world of capitalism and consumption has led to the misconception that suggests when we achieve a certain level of material success, we’ll be able to say we’ve made it. At that point we’ll attain the happiness and contentment we’re really after; but that’s not true.
Our egos might be satisfied for a while, but it’s not a long term solution. This is why many men end there lives like Sam Walton, thinking they’ve blown it!
So what’s the answer? What we really need to create in our lives is meaning, as Viktor Frankl told us :
“What man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him. What he needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him.”
In other words make your life significant. Have your life be a tool that adds value to the world in whatever way makes sense to you, whether it be through your business, your commitment to your family or some other way.
This is what will bring you to life and provide that sense of adventure and fulfillment every man wants. This is the key to feeling successful in life.
Get clear on the purpose behind your goals so that you don’t waste your life and your opportunity for a bigger adventure, pacifying stories that tell you, you need more to feel like you’re enough.
No woman or amount of money, the perfect body, a bigger house or faster car will set you free.
I am not saying these aren’t nice to haves, of course they are, but they aren’t going to set you free. You are the saviour you’ve been searching for. You already have everything you need, only a story of lack will keep you from seeing this.
Men go to all kinds of lengths to create what they believe will be the perfect conditions for happiness when in reality, it isn’t dependent on any external condition. So go for the big time. Find out what REALLY matters and go after that.
Discover if your goals are about adding ‘something’ to your life, in the hope they’ll provide the feeling of success you want, or to give your life greater meaning and adventure; the way to really feel successful in life.
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